From Joy and John Smith
Jackie Porter (18 Jun 1949 - 30 Jan 2022)
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Jackie was the fourth of eight children (Tony, Rita, Irene, Gina, John, Joy and Jane) born to Gladys and John Oxley, on 18th June, 1949. Growing up in Hainault, London, she went to Grange Hill school, starting work at the age of 15 to help the family. Living on her own for the first time at the Barbican YMCA, she joined The British Bank of the Middle East where she met the love of her life, Chris.
After getting engaged, they travelled across Europe, quite unusual for the time, in a very small car which barely made it to some destinations. Camping and eating cold baked beans, making friends along the way, she often told stories of their trip. That sense of adventure never left her as she continued to visit new places with friends and family over the years.
Jackie and Chris got married in 1976 at Bromley Registry Office, in a small ceremony with a few close friends. Already living in Shortlands and wanting to start a family, they set their hearts on a house in Petts Wood, naming it Petts Cottage. This would become her family home.
She poured her heart and soul into Petts Cottage, but it was her garden that truly reflected her personality. The rich variety of plants and flowers drew admiration from many gardeners and onlookers alike. The garden was somewhere she could lose herself and, in another life, she would very much have liked to have been a florist. Whenever she received flowers as a gift, she had a talent for rearranging them into something unique (whilst removing the lilies for Chris and James).
She welcomed her daughter, Anna, in 1979, and later her son, James in 1981, as well as many pets along the way (Poppy the cat, Billy the Budgie, Holly dog, and Bertie dog). She loved her children dearly and would do anything for them. Whether that’s driving a 100 miles in the middle of the night to return forgotten house keys for James or taking her first solo flight to help Anna move to New York, she happily did it. That giving nature defined her. She always thought of others first and was so kind and nurturing, which explains why she was a godmother too so many.
Birthday parties were a chance to show her creativity, baking cakes from locomotives to fire engines, and much more. She did it all for that magical smile on a child’s face when the cake was revealed. How she found the time and patience to make them remains a mystery, especially with Dad stealing the odd ‘iced biscuit wheel’ without her knowing. Aside from baking, she loved to play and watch tennis, both for the game itself and the friends she made; and raised an eyebrow when her brothers and sisters gave her a wooden racket for her 40th! She spent many a happy morning on the tennis courts at Willet Recreation Ground, where in between games she kept Anna and James entertained.
Yet it was her love for being a family, especially a big family, that touched everything she did. The close bonds she had with her brother and sisters, looking after each other and supporting their Mum after their father passed away at a young age; meant she valued family above all else. She was committed to replicating that love in being a wife and mother, and she certainly succeeded. The family parties, get-togethers, and of course the family knickers, were so full of laughter and joy, she cherished each one.
Once Anna and James were at secondary school, she worked for the Retail Price Index, Sainsbury’s, before taking on a part-time job at Knoll Rise surgery where she worked over a decade. She had many happy memories at the surgery, and enjoyed meeting up with friends there for spa days, charity walks and dinners. After caring for Chris throughout his 10-year battle with cancer, she took early retirement as her own health declined.
Little Bertie was somewhat of a spontaneous purchase but the best decision and one that gave her and the family great companionship and the opportunity to meet new friends. She spent many an afternoon with him curled up beside her as she watched Countdown, completed a crossword, hosted friends for cups of teas to ‘put the world to rights’ as she would say.
Diagnosed with Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis in November 2013, she wanted to help others, as so little is known of this disease. She contributed to online forums and joined group meetups to share personal experiences, always bringing her kind, warm and giving personality.
Fighting the whole way and being her positive self throughout, she sadly passed away at home on Sunday 30th January surrounded by her children and Bertie, as was her wish.
She always wanted the very best for everyone. She was the dearest friend, the most amazing sister, a loyal wife and the best Mum you could EVER wish for. We are fiercely proud of her and she will be missed more than words can say.
We love you mum, to the moon and back times infinity.
Love Anna, James, and Bertie xxx
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