Mary Ngairi Monro (10 Jun 1929 - 14 Jan 2021)

In loving memory of Mary Ngairi Monro who sadly passed away on 14th January 2021

Mary (or “May” to her family) was born in Edinburgh on 10th June 1929. She was the oldest of three children, which meant she developed an instinct to care for others from a very early age. Her childhood was interrupted by the war, and she was evacuated to Fife along with her mum, younger sister Margaret, and younger brother James (Jim). In the end, they only stayed a week as her dad sent a telegram asking them to come home. The provision of schooling at the time was a bit erratic, so she was able to spend her days doing exciting things like helping bring herds of cows and sheep from the railway sidings to the nearby market. She always said she had an easy war. There was an Anderson shelter in the back garden, which thankfully they only had to use once in earnest, and all was well except when they returned to the house to find that the budgie had died of fright.

Despite interruptions to her schooling, May started a job in the civil service aged just fifteen. This is where she met her future husband, Ron. He was sent to do his national service, but they wrote to each other regularly and started courting on his return. On their first date to the cinema, Ron gave her a tin of chocolates he’d brought back from Malaya, which were still on ration at home. Unfortunately, the tin was hermetically sealed. When they told the story, she always said “Imagine sitting with a 1lb box of chocolates on your knee that you couldn’t get into!”

May and Ron got married on 9th September 1950 and lived in various digs before they got their first council house in Oxgangs, Edinburgh in July 1955. They already had a young son named David, and daughter Elaine and son Angus soon followed to complete their family. May had had to give up her job when she got married, but Ron worked in the Revenue and each promotion usually meant a move for the whole family. In 1963, they moved to Kirkcaldy in Fife, where they had many happy holidays to Burntisland and Aberdeen. May was very keen on their children having a broad education, so while on holiday in Aberdeen, she would wake David up at 4 a.m. to go to the fish market and see the boats come in. Elaine and Angus were taken later in the day when all that remained was the smell.

After many years spent caring for her family, a move to East Kilbride in 1965 meant that May was able to realise a long-held dream of becoming a hospital nurse. She had wanted to do this since leaving school, but her mum hadn’t considered it a fit job for a lady. She loved her new job but another move in 1971 – this time to England – meant that she had to give it up. The family settled in Sefton, Merseyside but David missed Scotland and soon returned to East Kilbride on his own. May got a part time job in the Revenue and ended up working in the famous Liver building. Family life was good and included many day trips to Southport and to Blackpool to see the illuminations. May often had nieces to stay for short holidays and regularly took Elaine to stay with her cousins, who were now living in Southampton. In 1975, another move took the family to Caerphilly. By this time, May was an experienced packer and mover and, with her innate gift for organisation, she managed this whole move on her own (Ron was already working in Cardiff by the time they moved). Their new house was also the first house they bought rather than rented. She and Ron spent twelve happy years in Caerphilly, during which Elaine went to college in Middlesbrough and then settled in Nottingham, and Angus joined the Royal Corps of Transport and was stationed in Germany.

May finally took early retirement in 1985 and Ron followed her in 1988. They then upped sticks again and moved to Nottingham, close to Elaine who had by then married Paul and had a young family of her own. May chose Nottingham as it was also halfway between David, who was living in Lancashire with his wife Margaret and their young family, and Angus who had stayed in Caerphilly with his wife Marie. 
May and Ron made the most of their freedom and enjoyed many short breaks and holidays in their car, with Ron driving and May navigating using a road atlas. These trips usually included a steam railway for Ron and National Trust properties for May.  
In December 1995, Ron was diagnosed with leukaemia and May, despite recovering from a knee replacement operation, stepped up to care for him. There were never any complaints or self-pity – her philosophy was “It is what it is. Let’s get on with it.” Ron sadly died in October 1998.
After losing her soulmate, May threw herself into voluntary work, friendship clubs and church activities. Her Catholic faith had always been a large part of her life and she had always been a strong, independent woman; both of these things helped her during this difficult time. For fifteen years, May continued to live in their bungalow in Basford, Nottingham and make the most of her life. She would often help to look after her grandchildren, who remember her fondly for her straightforward manner, which was always well intended if sometimes a little blunt: “You’re short and dumpy like me, aren’t you?” 
In 2013, May was diagnosed with vascular dementia. Once again, she moved home; this time to Hawthorne Nursing Home, where she was convinced she was a member of staff, tried to organise everybody, and baffled the staff with her auld Scots language. She gave her family a few scares over the years, but her strong Scottish genes always pulled her through. 
May died on 14th January 2021, aged 91. She led a full and happy life, and will always be loved and remembered by her three children as “Mum”, their partners as “May”, her eight grandchildren as “Granny Mo”, and her seven great-grandchildren as “Granny Granny”.