Derek Loydall Barr (31 Jul 1931 - 15 May 2020)

In loving memory of Derek Loydall Barr who sadly passed away on 15th May 2020

Derek Barr

Derek Loydall Barr was born unto James Loydall and Dorothy Alice in July 1931, both of his parents work for the railway in Abbots Langley. They lived a nice life with regular holidays to Llandudno and lots of new toys to show off in the front garden. Derek was an only child, always claiming that it was because his parents got perfection first time! He attended Watford Grammar School until he left to join the RAF for his National Service - something which he was extremely proud of and which shaped him into a devoted and dedicated man. He was a long standing Watford Fan, regularly attending both home, away and international games thanks to a great Railway Discount.

Whilst doing his National Service he met Sheila Mary Smallbone in Surrey at a Church Group. After many trips to and from her home in Haselmere on the back of his Motorbike, they married on 27th March 1954. Sheila and Derek made their home in Abbots Langley, before setting in Hemel Hempstead. They had two children, Janet came first and then Heather arrived on the 11th March, not the 17th as Derek used to get confused! Derek then worked ardently for the railway until he was 53, taking early retirement and responding to their request for him to consult for them with “Not on your life!”.

Outside of work, Derek was a Scout Leader alongside Sheila being a big part of the Girl Guides. There must be a mention for Derek’s profound Bowling career, starting at the age of 14 and reaching the All England Finals at his peak. Over the almost 75 years that he bowled, he was Chairman, President and a Coach to many younger and less experienced players. Many, many hours were spent at various bowls clubs local to wherever he was living at the time. All of Derek’s Children, Grandchildren and his Great-Grandchild hold many dear memories of the bowls clubs. For Sheila, Janet and Heather, family holidays almost always centred around a bowls tournament - with he girls secretly hoping he’d get knocked out early so that they could spend some time together. Not that their wish came true very often!

Above all else, Derek was a devoted family man. Starting with his two daughters, he very quickly became wrapped around the little finger of them all, particularly his youngest daughter Heather, or Kip to her Ted! The first of his Grandchildren came in 1983 when Matthew was born, Michelle following 2 years after. This time also brought great sadness to Derek when his eldest daughter, Janet, sadly died in 1987 at a young age.

His third Grandchild, Hannah, was born unto Heather in 1990, with Rebecca making up the final four in 1992. Derek and Sheila moved to Heckington in 1993 to support their daughter, Heather, with raising the two girls. From then on, Derek, Sheila, Heather, Hannah and Rebecca were very much one family unit - with Derek and Sheila walking the girls to school and having them for a sleepover every weekend - meaning many breakfasts in bed and nights watching Big Break and the Generation Game. Always the selfless family man, Derek and Sheila would have all four grandchildren for many weeks during the school holidays with so many cherished memories made in 12 Station Road. Memories that would become all the more special when Derek’s only Grandson, Matthew, sadly passed away at the tender age of just 17.

There are many parallels between his life as a Father and his life as Grandad, and then later Papa. Making cars on the beach out of sand, iced buns on the way to pre-school, and being treated to fashionable new school coats and shoes. Many days were spent doing the Daily Telegraph Crossword Puzzle, looking at his Atlas, or walking Rex around the village. Nothing was ever too much trouble for Derek when it came to his family, unless it was time to listen to the football scores - when everybody had to be quiet!

Derek, Sheila, Heather and the girls enjoyed several family holidays as a 5 when his grandchildren were young, to Majorca and Portugal. On these holidays he would try to teach Sheila to swim, even when she was reluctant to take her feet off the floor of the pool, tracking Becky down when she’d wandered off and collecting the cheapest t-shirts that anyone could find.

Throughout his life, Derek was an avid gardener. Always happy when pottering around his plants. Growing the tastiest runner beans, saving the first raspberries for Heather and tending to his tomatoes in the greenhouse. Cutting up the bread with scissors and keeping it in Ice-Cream containers for the birds. In later years he could often be found in the garden with his Great-Granddaughter, Sophie, showing her the ropes and keeping her entertained.

Derek sadly lost his wife in December 2018 after a short battle with cancer. Ever the pillar of the family, Derek remained strong throughout - being a rock for all of his girls at the saddest of times. Since Sheila’s passing it must be said that Derek adapted remarkably. He had a new management in charge, several daily trips to the co-op and his ‘girls’ from Forget-Me-Not care home to take care of him. He carried on bowling with the help of his friends and their willingness to pick him up after losing his licence (all because of that one man in Swansea!). His family will be forever grateful for those 18 months with Derek, breakfasts before work, Sunday dinners at the Horseshoe and Papa’s childcare whilst working.

Despite a lifetime of achievements, Derek was forever a humble man - which is what made him truly special. Ted, Baldy, Papa - those in his life all know how lucky they are to have had him.