Tony Honess (11 Jun 1933 - 11 Jun 2020)

In loving memory of Tony Honess who sadly passed away on 11th June 2020.

Kim’s tribute to her Dad:

Dad was the best Dad in the world. He loved Sandra and I unconditionally from the moment we were born and he’s always been there for us in any way we needed, whether emotional support and encouragement or his million and one practical solutions to whatever life threw at any of us. When Ellie arrived I had the chance to see and appreciate even more his complete joy and natural instinct to love, protect and care for all of us. For example soon after Ellie was born we were in hospital about to go back to the main ward but there was no porter available to push the crib, and I was no use having had an epidural. Dad said ‘She’s my grand-daughter, I’ll take her’ and that was that, he was off with her! That was a typical Dad moment and one I’ll treasure forever.

Dad was a great role model for living a good life. When I was born, Mum and Dad lived in a static caravan. Maybe that explains my life as a ‘corporate gypsy’ travelling the world, which I love, but obviously curtailed recently! They soon ‘upgraded’ to a council house, then a semi, then small detached, then a beautiful but very run down large detached which these days could have featured on a restoration project TV show. As it was, it was just Dad taking down huge trees, building a double garage (complete with car engine inspection pit - he believed if a job’s worth doing it’s worth doing well) and then a beautiful (for the 1970s!) custom stone fireplace and feature wall, with Mum nitromorsing the wood panelling in the hall, staircase and landing, and keeping us all fed! I grew up thinking this was completely normal! Wouldn’t have it any other way! They were a great team, we all were.

Dad was decades ahead of his time. He chose environmental health as his career long before the environment was cool and trendy. It combined his love of repair, re-use and recycling, with healthy lives for everyone, and allowed him to make a positive difference in the community. He made the world a better place, both for his immediate family and the wider environment. To me he will always be the original and best eco-warrior, setting an example I’ve followed as best I can. He personally installed solar panels on the roof of our home in Hayward’s Heath back in the 1970s before most people had even heard of solar power.

He also decided to buy Hadlow Down Vineyard decades before English wine was heard of. Mum and the rest of the family thought he was slightly mad, in a good way, but we duly turned up each year for grape harvest (hard work) and wine making (interesting) and wine tasting (excellent fun and very good wine!). Dad loved being outside, having things to do, being with people (preferably if one of them was Mum) and his tractor! His time at the vineyard in his early retirement were very happy years, especially when Ellie was there to ‘help’! English wine is now widely acknowledged but Mum and Dad were pioneers helping make it what it is today.

Dad also drove us all over Europe on summer holidays before the package tourist market took off. It wasn’t relaxing for Mum and Dad driving all the way to the Adriatic coast in Italy for example, as we had to put the tent up each night on the way down and back. Sandra and I had our allotted jobs (fetch water, hand Dad tent pegs, etc). Dad did all the driving, could pack a seemingly impossible amount of stuff neatly in our estate car, and did all the tent pitching and striking. Mum was navigator, cook and general assistant. They were great holidays and we got to see so much more of each country than just flying to a hotel and beach and back again.

Dad was an original thinker, and way ahead of his time. He also had a fabulous positive mindset. He thought anything was possible. With Dad around, we grew up knowing anything was possible if we were prepared to work at it. He started out without much, but he and Mum built a glorious family life together for all of us, through hard work, thinking long term, being frugal, doing the right things, always taking care of family, and being brave to believe in what’s possible.

Dad was the beating heart of our family in so many ways. Maybe because he suffered the loss of his own Dad through divorce early in his life, he really understood how important a role it is. He was the man of the house from an early age, and that defined him, in the best way. He was the reliable, brilliant, useful, pragmatic, dependable, cheerful, ever present rock to his Mum, Sister, Wife, Children and Grandchild. He was exceptional, very very special. We are all struggling with ‘life after Dad’ as he was so completely brilliant at whatever we needed and we’re going to have to find a new way. But we will, because that’s what he taught us was possible.