We are gathered here today in the memory of Deenagh Mary Bonner, our mother, wife to Bill, sister to Jill, a friend, teacher and mentor to many pupils,
so that we may acknowledge and share both our joy in the gift that her life was to us and the pain of her passing.
In sharing the joy and the pain together today may we lessen the pain and remember more clearly the joy!
Deenagh was 77 when she passed away quietly on Tuesday 14th January in her home here in Southampton.
It’s hard to say goodbye and we wish that we had more time and had been more prepared and that perhaps that during the time we had, had spent it more of it together.
We wish that so much of her life had not been lost to her latter ill health,
that things could have been different for her and for us but we are most grateful for all the blessings bestowed upon us as a family and for all the ‘good times’!
Whilst we know that she is at peace and that her struggles are at an end, there is still incredible pain and sadness left in our hearts.
Even though she is gone, she has left the legacy of her love.
The way she touched our lives will remain and I ask you to keep those memories alive by sharing them with us all and with one another today. (242)
Mum was a school teacher all of our lives and over the years became head of department for P.E.
She taught full-time at Chamberlain Park formerly known as Weston Park Girls School for around 35 years.
Even after her retirement she would continue to teach by joining the learning support department, motivating those who were excluded from school and getting them through their exams and was successful at this and derived enormous satisfaction.
She trained at Southampton La Saint Union Teacher Training College from 1972-1975, whilst raising us three small children.
Throughout her career though she was fully committed to her job and also was a wonderful mother to us as kids growing up. She was full of energy and enthusiasm and imparted this to us and her pupils.
At age 40 she presented us with a wonderful surprise and addition to our family in a baby sister, Laura, here today magically aged 37!
Laura too followed mum into teaching making her the third generation of teachers amongst our family, as our grandmother, Josephine Hellyer, on mums side, was also a teacher. (182)
Deenagh leaves 4 of us children behind,
Mark, father to 4, Patrick, Philip, Mischa and Konrad,
Rebekah, mother to four, Leah, Danielle, Avi and Adi.
All beautiful grandchildren to Deenagh.
2 of these grandchildren have 4 of their own, making Mum a Great Grandmother.
And last but not least Myself (Justine) and Laura.
When we were young kids after a day at St Patrick’s school she would take us, in the summer months, along to Victoria country park, where we played and swam on the shore and she would work on her tan and bury her head in her scifi and fantasy books.
Later in life she would discover the joy of computer games and was often seen completely immersed in front of her apple mac.
Throughout her life mum loved her garden and she took great pride and pleasure in her flowers.
It takes patience, perseverance and a love for living things to grow a garden as lovely as she had, she was very good at it! (168)
Mum loved car-boots and a good bargain.
When ever we wanted something in particular she would track it down no matter what and surprise us when we next saw her, with it.
She had a terrific knack for finding what she wanted too – mostly cloths, books, knick-knacks and Wade Ornaments, of which she had hundreds.
She loved dressing up and following the latest fashions, enjoying the glamour of getting ready to go out on a Saturday night, the long frock would be adorned whilst
the “Carmen Heated Rollers” would be working their magic, the make up would be applied.
All of this was in direct contrast to her daytime wear of short netball skirts and frilly sports knickers or Adidas track suits.
She was so liked and had many friends from her work and various interests.
Many of you are here today.
Over the years both professionally with the school, Laura especially did well out of this going on many a ski trip, and as a result of two of her children living abroad, she took holidays visiting Becky many times in Israel and Mark many times in Denmark and Justine wherever she happened to be.
Mum was our touchstone.
The person who continually brought the family together despite our geographical differences.
We could wax lyrical all day about Deenagh, our beloved mother, but we must conclude.
As she would say to us as she put us to bed, when we were all little
“Night, Night, God Bless, I Love you” , We now in turn say to her
“Night, Night God Bless, We Love You, Mum”.
Dear Mark, Justine and family, I only came across this announcement today. I am so sorry to hear about the passing of your mum. Although she seemed to have led an active and fun life, leaving you all with lovely memories. I remember you both from St Patrick’s (I was in Mark’s Class) and wanted to offer my sincere condolences. Lynne Spencer (nee Walker)
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