Brenda Neal (10 Nov 1927 - 25 Jul 2019)

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BrendaDementia UK

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Location
Anglesey Chapel, Bretby Crematorium Geary Lane Burton upon Trent DE15 0QE
Date
16th Aug 2019
Time
11.30am
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Location
Keepers Cottage Bretby Park Bretby DE15 0QG
Date
16th Aug 2019
Time
12.15pm

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In loving memory of Brenda Neal (Nee Starkey) who passed away peacefully on 25th July 2019, aged 91 years.

Beloved wife of the late Thomas Gordon Neal, much loved Mum of Lynn and Judy, Mother-in-Law and special friend to Graham and Mike, loved sister to the late Harry Starkey and his wife Mary and sadly missed by their children Philip, Pam and Carol; Nan to Jamie, Matthew and Amy and Great Nan to Edward, Amelie, Fleur, Archie and Charlie. Sadly missed by Sally, Jaycee, Iain, Monica, Leah, Matthew, Maite, Abril and Carmen.

Fond Sister in law of the late Charles Douglas Neal and his late wife Betty. Sadly missed by her nephews Roger and his wife Claire, and Nigel and his wife Jill.

Life long friend to the late Sheila and Tony Franklin and their children, Gill, Richard, Sally, Johnathan and David and Sheila's late sister and her husband, Margaret and John Hind and their children Sue and Michael.

Sadly missed by good friends John and Wendy Auger and their children Julie and Simon.

Thanks to Jayne Hampson for all her understanding and support during the last few years.

Thanks to all the very caring staff at Littleover Nursing Home, Brenda's home for the last six years.

Special thanks to the Staff members of ward 102 at the Royal Derby Hospital. Their kindness, compassion and support will never be forgotten and helped so much at a very difficult time.

Nigel & Jill Neal donated £50 in memory of Brenda

In fond loving memory of Auntie Brenda

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Phil, Pam,Carol Starkey donated £20 in memory of Brenda

Happy Memories

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Angela Bowers donated £10 in memory of Brenda
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JUDY NEAL donated £10 in memory of Brenda

Such a worthwhile cause.

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JUDY NEAL wrote

Such a worthwhile cause.

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JUDY NEAL wrote

Such a worthwhile cause.

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Monica Taylor posted a picture
Leah with Aunty Judy and Nana Neal.We love and miss you.xxxxx

Leah with Aunty Judy and Nana Neal.We love and miss you.xxxxx

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Monica Taylor posted a picture
Mum loved this little man.xxx

Mum loved this little man.xxx

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Sally Hughes lit a candle
Sally Hughes wrote

I’ll never forget the first time I met Brenda when Matthew introduced me to his Nan.
She was so warm and welcoming and smiled the whole time I was there.
We shared special memories of Matthew as he was growing up, fond and treasured memories.
I am so glad to have known her and so glad she got to meet our beautiful girls, two of her great granddaughters.
We will go on to remember the special times we shared together, will never forget you Brenda.
Rest in peace lots of love Sal xxx

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Judy Neal posted a picture
Lovely photo of Monica and Mum back in summer 2012.

Lovely photo of Monica and Mum back in summer 2012.

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Judy Neal posted a picture
Mum, Aunty Sheila and Aunty Marg - three friends through thick and thin for so many years.

Mum, Aunty Sheila and Aunty Marg - three friends through thick and thin for so many years.

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Lynn Hughes posted a picture
Celebrating Mum's 91st birthday in November 2018

Celebrating Mum's 91st birthday in November 2018

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Lynn Hughes wrote

Mum has always had a great love of children and her and Dad were delighted to become parents themselves.
They were overjoyed to become grandparents and couldn't wait to visit us in Ivybridge, Devon, to help out when Jamie was born. Mum had been knitting for months and arrived with everything a baby could possibly need including a magnificent shawl. This has been used over the years by many members of the family. it is now in Canada where Mum's granddaughter Amy has used it for her son Archie and her daughter Charlie.It has become a much loved family heirloom.
When Matthew was born Mum would walk round the garden with him in her arms, quietly talking to him and showing him the flowers, enjoying the moment.
When I went into labour with Amy, Mum drove over from Littleover and took me to the hospital. She then went to meet the boys from school and looked after them until Graham came home. She was thrilled to have a granddaughter and was delighted when we chose Amy as her name, she had a favourite Aunt called Amy.
Mum loved Christmas and made sure all our Christmases at home were special, Santa always brought us what we wanted and it was always an exciting time. In later years when she came to stay for Christmas with us she would look forward to a "snowball" or two skilfully concocted by Graham. On Christmas morning we would have breakfast before we opened any presents, the children were nearly bursting with excitement, then we would go into the lounge which was crammed with gifts of all shapes and sizes from Santa. Mum loved watching everyone open their presents and being surrounded by noise and excitement.
She had a memorable game of cricket one day with the children and to their delight she hit the ball through dining room window creating a huge crack. She liked to be involved in things the children did too, plays at school, bonfire night with the cubs, birthday parties, swimming presentations, dancing shows and babysitting.
Over the years Mum has demonstrated huge strength, love and determination to make life the best that she could for Dad, Judy and I. We are very proud of the way 'she just got on with it' and despite many setbacks with Dad's health, still managed to put Dad on dialysis every week for many, many years. She learned to drive and became a confident driver, enabling her to visit friends and family whenever she wanted.
Mum's diagnosis of dementia sent us all on a very challenging journey, there are no guide books or rules to follow. Judy and I were lucky that she could still recognise us, give us a smile and a kiss even in hospital and that we were able to share a last kiss the morning she passed away.

With love from Lynn xx

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Lynn Hughes posted a picture
Mum with Graham outside the church, enjoying the day at Jamie and Jaycee's wedding.

Mum with Graham outside the church, enjoying the day at Jamie and Jaycee's wedding.

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Jamie Hughes wrote

Though her smile is gone forever and her hand I cannot touch.
I still have so many memories of the Nan I loved so much.
Her memory is now my keepsake with which i’ll never part.
God has her in his keeping I have her in my heart.
Sadly missed but never forgotten rest in peace my wonderful nan.
Jamie xxxxxx

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Elaine Morris lit a candle
JUDY NEAL wrote

When Mum lost Dad in 1987 she was wonderful; she made a point of joining an over 50's club with her two friends Sheila and Margaret and they were always doing something and keeping busy. They went on coach trips, organised holidays in this country and abroad, dancing, making new friends along the way. You never heard a moan between them. Three wonderful ladies who embraced life, enjoyed each others company and always had time "for a cup of tea".

Every day, if Mum had not got anything organised, she would either be in the garden, or out for a walk. With being on Carlisle Avenue, she had St. Georges playing fields close by and the countryside. If the weather prevented her going out, then the knitting would appear - wonderful garments from patterns that were so intricate you wondered how she ever followed them.

Unfortunately Mum was diagnosed with Dementia, and then the three became two and then sadly Mum was the only one left. Mum went into a Nursing Home in February 2012 and then to Littleover Nursing Home on August 10th 2013 (never forgotten as it was Dad's birthday).

In all the time that Mum was in the Nursing Home, she was always ready with a kiss or hug for Lynn and I and the carers that looked after her. You never saw her crying or shouting or being miserable, she just watched and listened and formed her own opinion, probably sometimes wishing she had the "voice" to comment; but giving us a cheeky smile that she was conspiring with us in thought.

Our Mum was a very courageous lady, she tackled things in life that others may not have even been able to think about. Throughout our lives, Mum and Dad always had words of encouragement. They never held us back and as a consequence enjoyed holidays in Wales, Cornwall, London and Canada; not letting a kidney machine slow them down or get in the way.

Precious memories, stored for ever. Thank you to two wonderful parents.
























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Monica Taylor wrote

Such a beautiful lady inside and out.Who through the years since I was 11 treated me as a daughter.I used to call her mum.I will never forget all the guidance she gave me.I am going to miss you terribly and hope that you are now with Dad with no pain or suffering.Rest in peace.Love you loads.Monica.xxxx

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Lynn Hughes posted a picture
Mum and Judy visiting us in  Barton on Christmas Day 2016.

Mum and Judy visiting us in Barton on Christmas Day 2016.

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Lynn Hughes posted a picture
This is an example of Mum's beautiful counted cross stitch. She sent it out to Canada as a wedding present for Amy and Iain. We enclosed the above photo too.

This is an example of Mum's beautiful counted cross stitch. She sent it out to Canada as a wedding present for Amy and Iain. We enclosed the above photo too.

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  • I love this picture, I had not seen it before. Mum made about five of these beautiful tapestries for members of the family and friends, she was so clever and looked quite proud of her achievement in the photo above. Love Judy xx

    Posted by JUDY on 14/08/2019 Report abuse
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Amy Hughes wrote

I have two very distinct memories of my Nan. The first of which is her coming over to babysit my brothers and I in Barton. At that time the lounge was in the middle room, we had a large brown sectional sofa and a TV in the corner (I can picture it so clearly). Jamie, Matthew and I would lie on the floor in front of the telly watching The A Team and Nan would spoil us by bringing over a six pack of Walkers assorted crisps and some Shandy Bassy!

My other favourite memory of Nan was standing beside her in her long thin kitchen on Carlisle Avenue, barely able to see over the kitchen counter, watching her butter Warburton's bread with her bone handled butter knives. She would always make me a cheese and pickle sandwich and a glass of Ribena. I am very grateful to have some of Nan's butter knives here in Canada, I use them everyday and they always make me think of her.

In the time that I knew my Nan, she was an avid walker, a beautiful gardener, she enjoyed reading, knitting, doing incredibly complex jigsaw puzzles and ironed everything, even her knickers! She always encouraged me to dance and sing and would play tea parties with me in the garden for hours at a time. She loved the smell of lavender and roses and had the most magical quartz crystals in her garden which always fascinated me as a child. At Christmas time she made the most delicious jam tarts which rarely lasted 24 hours when my brothers were home! She also enjoyed floating coffee's on special occasions and after big Sunday roasts.

I will forever treasure these memories of my incredible Nan xxx

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Amy Hughes posted a picture
Nan and Mum at Jamie and Jaycee's beautiful wedding, July 2008.

Nan and Mum at Jamie and Jaycee's beautiful wedding, July 2008.

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Amy Hughes posted a picture
Aunty Judy and Nan at Matthew and Sally's wedding, July 2005.

Aunty Judy and Nan at Matthew and Sally's wedding, July 2005.

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  • Beautiful photo

    Posted by Monica on 12/08/2019 Report abuse
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Amy Hughes lit a candle
Amy Hughes posted a picture
Mum, Nan, Aunty Judy, Archie and Amy having a lovely visit at Littleover Nursing Home, January 13th 2018.

Mum, Nan, Aunty Judy, Archie and Amy having a lovely visit at Littleover Nursing Home, January 13th 2018.

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Amy Hughes posted a picture
A Christmas bear made especially for my Nan. December 25th 2004.

A Christmas bear made especially for my Nan. December 25th 2004.

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Amy Hughes posted a picture
Nan, Aunty Judy and Uncle Mike July 19th 2008.

Nan, Aunty Judy and Uncle Mike July 19th 2008.

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Amy Hughes posted a picture
November 19th 2005.

November 19th 2005.

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Amy Hughes posted a picture
Nan with her radiating smile :)  September 2004

Nan with her radiating smile :) September 2004

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