Joseph Gurung (1 Aug 1931 - 1 Nov 2018)

I miss you meme. And I always want to remember you as a happy smiling face. I shall never find anyone like you. Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead said Adele. And it just hurts so much still!!

The new year has started and it feels incomplete without you around. You were much more than a grandfather to me and I never imagined you would go so far away one day. Being the grand daughter who was lucky enough to have spent the most time with you I shall always make you proud and carry forward your legacy of living and loving life.

“Bajey Gaye, Boju gaye dwita pustakalaya lagey ra gaye (in nepali)” which translates to grandfather passed away, grandmother passed away and took away two libraries with them. I was fortunate enough to have spent some lovely moments with my meme (had 24X7 access) and in the process learnt a lot from him. Not everything can be studied from books, my father always says knowledge never goes to waste and therefore I used to love listening to meme speak for hours recounting his childhood days in Calcutta, growing up and boarding school in Darjeeling and later on his youth to old age in Delhi along with his travels to Singapore, UK and Hong Kong of which he loved his time spent with his most beloved youngest daughter, son in law and grand-daughter (Sandra, Vipul and Sanvi) in UK and Hong Kong.

Some of his life lessons that I would like to share today are:
1.Babu, Look after self. If you look after yourself only then can you take care of others.
2.Always do good for others whenever possible. People never ask for help sometimes you just have to understand and do however much is possible from your end.
3.If you cannot do good for anybody (Its ok nobody shall find fault in you) but do not do any harm either. Never harm anybody by thoughts, words or even action.
4.Education is the most important tool to fight with in life. Read and spread knowledge not hate.
5.The most important thing in life is not money rather friends and family. If you are able to earn good people in your life all other material goods will follow suit.

You had always with your actions taught us that when one does well unto others universe pays you back in mysterious ways. I hope you are proud of all of us, my dearest meme!!

Love you forever meme
Until we meet again !!
Kafal

RIP departed soul. I am sure it's a lot more peaceful out there. We all will see you there when time comes.

When someone you love passes, be inspired by their passing and their legacy. Instead of drowning in our sorrows, be inspired to live a happy and peaceful like he did when he were still around.
Live each day with purpose, with action, with positivity, and with encouragement. Our Daddy will be very proud of us and smile down on us from Heaven.
When he's gone and leave a heartache that no one can ever make better. But his love for us leaves so many memories that no one else can take away. Our father was a quiet and simple man who lived a very charmed & beautiful life. We and our whole family to thank for it. May my words of peace and comfort ease the pain that we are feeling now, and may my prayers hasten our father’s journey into heaven.

May my condolences bring you comfort and may my prayers ease the pain of this loss. I am really sorry bada i wont be able to meet u .We will miss you you will be in our hearts ❤forever bada .
Romeo gurung

My deepest sympathies go out to you and your family during this difficult period. May you find the comfort and peace that you seek and may the soul of your Dad rest in peace.

Rest in Heaven Uncle.

Regards
Meenu Duggal

Prayers and fond memories are what we have to remember our dearly departed. My most heartfelt condolences. May god give strength to the family to vercone during this time of saddness.

Regards
Akhil

I am deeply saddened by the loss that you and your family are going through. My condolences. May your uncle's soul rests in peace and may God give you and your family the peace and support that you need.
Regards,
Ashok Sharma.

My deepest condolences to all those, who have had the chance or an opportunity, to be part of a moment in Meme's life. I know that, I, definitely was part of one!

I had the rarest of chance and the grandest of opportunities to bask upon the love and affection of Meme and Mam when I got to stay with the Lama family (Thanks to Toto).

For me, Meme was the Grandpa that I never had (since my grandparents had passed away during my infancy) and for anyone who has met Meme, would know how irresistible his cute yet seemingly sly smile was; so welcoming and un-threatening his personality was. He was never the Grumpy Old Man that you'd fear.

Meme would always greet me with a big smile by saying Doctor Babu (even though I had just started working as a junior doctor) with such enthusiasm that I would forget all the hardships that I had gone through at the hospital and be willing to push even harder the next day. Such was his aura.

I remember listening in awe, to his stories and recollections of his younger days, while sitting at the dining table or in the garden, under the sun. Never a story that was boring or uninteresting, always a pleasure to listen to; so full of joy, humour and inspiration. He was also a pleasure to look at, by the way he maintained himself, so well groomed even in his 80s (knowing me who almost has borderline OCD, that is exactly how maintained I aspire to be in my old age, among other things of course).

Meme was so much fun to be with. Be it playing card games during Diwali or carrom board game during leisure time. Or sometimes, breaking ice in the room by cracking one liners or by mere looks, most of which were usually targeted at Mam much to her chagrin. Sorry Mam.

All that being said, I can't seem to recollect the first and the last time I had met Meme. Looking back, it seems like I have always known him. That's how much of an impact Meme has had on me. There are very few people in our lives who can imprint on you so much, in such a short period of time. Meme is one such lovely human being who taught me how to be humble, polite, knowledgeable, inspirational, affectionate, humorous, charming - in short - a Gentleman. And I will always remember him as nothing less than a Gentleman who lived his life to the fullest surrounded by his loving family.

Love you Meme. I know that wherever you are, you are smiling at me, and at all of your family and friends. And we are all smiling back at you with all our heart.

Aapka Doctor Babu.

Dearest meme,

I write this as a reminder of what a human being is supposed to be.

You were definitely the wise old man that everyone talks about but also a young one at heart. I am so far away and still partly in disbelief. But I figure we should let the elderly go. You did your time to the best of anyone’s ability. You were a wonderful son, brother, uncle, father, father-in-law, grand-father and great-grandfather. Not to forget a hard-working employee and a helping hand for those in need. You even made friends over tea and church.

A man of few words, you let many things slide past maybe because you have seen worse and maybe just because this world is not worth taking sides or fighting with the ones you’re meant to love and keep close. One can only hope that others understand the value of a familial relationship. Personal differences aside, there are things we should leave behind/ overcome when it comes to spending time with each other or even for the sake of some loved ones. Nobody could have showed this better than you. I hope this resonates with others as well. Family is a relationship we are born with, nothing needed to invest as we grow together, it is the easiest to nurture compared to befriending people you’ve never met before where you go through confusions, rejections and heartbreaks with a potential of being left with no relation to name.

Ofcourse, everyone goes through their own time of being difficult. Giving each other the silent treatment, maybe even hurting one another. You did too, but it is okay meme. You are only human. It is the recovery that describes who we really are. I hope Meme, as you did, rest of mankind also learns how to be at peace with at least their own family and make the effort to deal with the differences in a sane way.

I am fortunate to have shared a good part of my life with you. Listening to your incredible stories, the tiger in Kurseong while on a Picnic and you being the store master at St. Alphonsus are some of my most favorite. I have lost count of the times I might have asked you to tell me the same story again and again! I will miss sharing my “kudum-kudum” tid-bits to go with our good ol’ dal-bhaat-maasu, having spicy Korean food with you followed by fiery butts, joking around with and teasing Rose mam and just your quiet presence.

As you, I hope to try and look at the positive, grab hold of opportunities, not be shy of my responsibilities, keep reading and help others when the time comes.

My contributions to your life are incomparable to what your children and grand-children especially Kafal have done for you. But, the one thing I am definitely proud of is having been behind the lens that has captured most of our times together with family.

You have aged and lived gracefully, Meme. I am forever thankful to you and Rose mam for giving me the most kind-hearted and wonderful mother.

You are within us. Love you forever and always.

May your soul rest in Peace with wonderful meals and books in heaven.
Yours,
Toto babu (In your sweet gentle voice)

Rest in peace, uncle. My deepest condolences to all family and friends during this time.