Sandra Garnham (19 Nov 1943 - 6 Jun 2017)

In loving memory of Sandra Garnham who sadly passed away on 6th June 2017

Just before the end of the war mum was born, the second child, on the 19th November 1943. Mum's grandma told her that from the start of her life she was always stubbornly determined (and as her child I can confirm that this remained til her dying day!). The family lived at the back of a fruit and vegetable shop in Bowling Back Lane. The fruit in those days came packed in slatted wooden crates. Mum explains "My Gran said that one day she saw me trying to ease an orange out of the crate in an area where the box had split slightly. After some considerable time, I managed to pull an orange out. Success! As I was about to eat this orange Grandma shouted "No! That's not yours, but the shop owner had also watched, and he said "leave her, she's earned the orange" I've always preferred oranges even to this day"

113 Roundwood Avenue was the first home that Sandra remembers vividly. She recalls "Here we had both a front and back garden. The back garden was more like a mini allotment. As both mum and dad worked, the gardening was down to my Grandma. She loved gardening and she passed her knowledge on to me. I would be in the garden with my grandma and she would tell me what things were. So which plant was a plant and which plant was a weed. I have spent so many hours working the garden with my grandma as she tended both flowers and vegetables. Also, we kept chickens in the back garden. The front garden, however, was quite a square garden with grass in the centre bordered by a flower bed. We had quite a few clumps of red carnations which grandma was quite proud of. She would always want the largest flower bloom on the top of each stem. So it was our task to side bud each flower stem. Grandma taught me this activity, and I spent many an occasion on my hands and knees taking the extra unwanted side buds off. It was only many many years later that I found out I was shown how to do this as grandma found it difficult to get up and down to do the job... I can never thank her enough for the things she taught me."

Mum's childhood consisted of lots of outdoor play, playing kisscats (I think she may have meant kiss catch?!) getting into trouble at school for talking too much and generally being a tomboy, as mum says "I always had loads of energy and would try most things..... compet(ing) with the boys"

Being so boisterous and full of energy, it came as a great shock and worry to both mum and her family when she awoke one morning to find that she couldn't move the lower part of her body properly. Mum told me "I cried and shouted for my mum. I knew I was bad, but when I saw the fear on my mum's face, this made me even more afraid. Mum could always make us well. But not this time. The doctor was called. At first, they were not too sure what the problem was, but it was suggested that my bed be brought downstairs and set up in the lounge. As my illness did not respond as expected the doctor decided that I should be sent to the hospital. Mum at that time really thought that I had caught Polio, as my legs were in so much pain. This proved wrong, my illness was rheumatic fever. A bad enough illness, but it would have been much worse had it been polio"

In total, mum spent over a year recovering from rheumatic fever, including having to learn to walk again. She missed out on a lot of schooling because of this. As a bright student before her illness, it was a huge disappointment to Sandra and her mum that she failed her 11 plus, and instead of being able to go to Grammar School she went to the local secondary high school. Mum's best subject was Biology, least favourite: Maths. Much of this study meant little to Sandra's mum, who thought that she was wasting her time trying for O levels. She convinced Sandra to train as a nursery nurse "a two-year course with a certificate at the end" "You really did have to take notice of your parents in my younger days" says mum. "I really loved working with the young children, also I enjoyed it when I went to care for the babies. So whatever the reason Mum had for me going on this course, she really had chosen well for me."

The paragraphs above were taken from mum's autobiography that she started writing some years ago. Unfortunately, she didn't get much further than her first days as a nursery nurse, but it was a delight to find her written book when I was clearing out her possessions recently, and I hope you've enjoyed reading some of her words!

Mum enjoyed her job as a nursery nurse for over 35 happy years, running many successful creches in the Wakefield and Castleford area. I'll always have memories of her painting cartoon characters on the windows of her nurseries, she's definitely passed her creative talents down to me and my brother, Daniel has her talent for gardening, and I have a more general creative talent, but I've not yet mastered crochet quite like mum could!

I was so pleased, in retirement, that mum (and Daniel) decided to move to Nottingham to be nearer me. I have wholeheartedly cherished the 8 years that we have all been together as a close family, and it has been wonderful to see mum finally enjoying life, her dog, her garden and our company. We are so lucky to have known her, she was never anything short of 100% dedicated to her kids, and her kindness, compassion and green fingers definitely live on in us both!