Walter Ward (9 Aug 1930 - 10 Jul 2016)

My birthday - another one without you. Miss you so nuch 💔💔💖

2001 was our mum and dad's Golden Wedding anniversary and by way of a celebration, 14 of us hired a villa in Spain and spent the week together. One evening, when we were out for a walk after dinner, dad remakes that he couldn't believe 50 years had gone by, just like that! Of course they had another 11 years together after than and a lot of us here today spent their 60th wedding anniversary celebrating together.

I remarked on that comment he had made,my ears before, to my sisters on the morning dad died: that 85, almost 86 years had gone by, just like that, S we sat and listened to the world going about it's business as if northern had happened, whilst trying to comprehend that for us, it wouldn't be the same ever again.

When someone you love dies, you look back at who and what they were, the part they played in your life and the mark they've left on the world. The easier bit is to look at what our dad was.

The third eldest in a family of 13 children who could go for years without seeing each other and yet pick up where they'd left off when they finally did get together. Over the last few years he took great delight in telling us stories from his youth, growing up in a large family, all crammed into a 2 bed-terraced house just a few streets away from here. Stories about playing football in the streets and setting up a local football team which didn't last long when defeats ran into double figures. And about going to the council house in Nottingham to meet the mayor as the size of the family bought some local celebrity status - visiting at the same time as Gracie Fields!

He left home and joined the Grenadier Guards at 18, and could still recite his service number - 44413237 - from memory and so apparently can my sister Dee who rattled it off this morning! He spent time around the UK and in Germany, which sparked an interest in travel overseas, although it took a few years for that spark to ignite. He laughed about coming home on leave and finding that the family had moved house and not told him and he had to spend the night on a neighbour' sofa. It was during that sting in the army that he met our mum.

He went on to have a successful career of over 30 years as a well-respected police officer, rising to the rank of Chief Inspector. His choice of career wasn't always appreciated when we girls were younger, although I'm sure he wouldn't mind me mentioning that if did, on occasions, come in very handy when he could send a young PC down to the City Ground to queue up for tickets for me and my friends. He was tall, over 6ft and handsome in his uniform, and proud to have served his country.

He was a husband to our mum for 60 years, and they always seemed to come as a pair. They were happy in each other's company and you rarely seemed to get one without the other. They endured hardships but also many good times, creating memories and recording them in the stacks of photographs that we are going through now and reliving ourselves, as he was a very keen photographer. They travelled on holiday to. Greece and Turkey, years before they became fashionable holiday resorts, when the travel bug finally bit, and retired to Spain, mainly for mum's health, even though he wasn't that Ken on the heat. He would have done anything for her and he usually did, and although he made a huge effort to. Sorry on when mum died. He never got over her loss. He insisted every Sunday on getting smartly dressed and going to the cemetery to sit with her and remember their life together.

He was a father to 4 daughters, having to cope wi the pain of losing one of them, our sister Sandy. But he always worked hard to provide a loving home for us and as we grew up and flew the nest he was always there, in the background to help if we needed advice or guidance. He was popular with our friends and everyone liked him: school friends would remark on how handsome he was and how much fun he was and adult friends found him charming and kind.

He was a grandfather, great-grandfather and more recently a great-great-grandfather and if it perhaps in those relationships that we can look at the 'who' he was. Always private, he very rarely expressed an opinion about issues but would happily and patiently listen to ours, no matter how outlandish but could provide a well-timed word of wisdom or cautionary word of advice to help us along. He wasn't overtly religious - the story of him contemplating becoming a missionary seems to have passed into family folklore and I still don't know if that was actually true of not, but as he retired and grew older and seemed to have a peace about him and he was happy with his lot. Although physically his health caused him considerable pain in the last few years, he still stuck to his routine of shopping, going to the library and buying flowers for our mum and sister on a weekly basis.

He was funny at social gatherings with a ready smile and a big laugh. He and mum were both good people who would put themselves out to help others and I've been so touched by the reminders of support he gave to friends in their difficult times and the fondness with which they remember him. Cousins too have passed on their memories of him visiting on his police motor-cycle when they, and he, were younger, of visits for Sunday tea and of him being a much loved uncle,

He was an avid fan of technology, always on his computer. He taught himself programming and would sit for hours until a technical problem was solved. He learnt German in the army and taught himself Anish and Russian. He loved gardening - a love he has passed on to my sisters, he was a good cook and he could knit and follow patterns for dress-making which did cause some hilarity on the family. But as kids we appreciated the toys he would sew for us for Christmas - perhaps the dresses he made not so much! He wa creative and wrote funny and interesting letters and he loved music. He approached life in a steady, practical manner and those mannerisms are evident in my sisters and his grand daughters. His grandchildren and great-grandchildren share his unquestioning belief that doing the right thing was always the right thing to do. He and I shared a great love of sport and regularly drove mum, and anyone else in the house, mad as we where glued to the tennis, rugby, football, cricket and anything else that was on TV. He trial led with Mansfield Town as a goal keeper, he played cricket, badminton and bowls and trained the police tug of war team. His kindness and strength and determination to carry on the face of any adversity lives on in the younger generations of the family as they make their way in the world. He raised us to be strong and independent, as he was, and that is evident in the characters of all the family. I hope I can speak for all of us when I say thank you to him, for everything that he ever was and everything that he ever did for us.

I know we will miss him but if we want to feel close to him we can revisit the thousands of memories he left with us, or we can speak to family members he loved and who loved him, who share so many of his ideals about life. He and our mum were married in this church in 1951, and the vows they both took that day were lived out in their devotion to each other and their family every day since.

We chose a shortened version of a quote for the memorial of service guide perhaps the quote, in full here now, can be the tribute to someone who can never be replaced:

"He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often and loved much; who has gained the respect of intelligent men and the love of little children; who has filled his niche and accomplished his task, who has left the world better than en found it, whether by an improved poppy, a perfect poem or a rescued soul; who has never lacked apop recitation for earth's beauties, nor failed to express it; who has always looked for the best in others and given the best he had; whose life is an inspiration; whose memory a benediction."