Jean Kathleen Whitnall (23 Aug 1930 - 8 Jul 2024)

In loving memory of Jean Kathleen Whitnall who sadly passed away on 8th July 2024

Such a long and full life, Mum.

This isn't an easy thing to write, and certainly just a few words cannot suffice for all that you did in your nearly 94 years.

Born at 1, Approach Road, Maxton, Dover, your first years of live were spent happily at 55 Manor Road, Dover. Like so many of our family, you attended St Martins Primary School in Markland Road.

Then, World War ll began and, with so many other children, you and your sister, Joyce, and your classmates at St Martins were evacuated to Wales. Your brother, George, being a little older, was already at Dover Grammar School for Boys, so was sent to the next valley - Ebbw Vale - with his school. Here, in the region of Blaenau Gwent, you and Joyce were homesick and so after a short time, your Mum - Edie Cropton - got on a train one day after receiving a letter from you, and brought you back home to Dover. George, at 14, was quite enjoying his independence and, showing his incredible resilience, stayed with his evacuation family in Wales and then on to King's College. He never returned to the family home.

At this point in time, the Nazis had occupied France and Doodlebugs - those terrifying pilotless planes - were being launched from the French Coast near Calais, so Dover wasn't the best place to be. Especially for children! But, maybe that's where you gained your 'never-give-up' spirit, Mum. Luckily, almost all the family survived the war.

Dad often used to say to us, " You might as well make the best of it, 'cos none of us is going to get out of this alive".

He was right, of course, and, Mum, you certainly always made the best of it. After the war, and leaving school at a relatively young age, you worked in Maxton Laundry, which was just round the corner from the family home. As a teenager, you met a handsome, young chap who lived in Eaton Road, just off Elms Vale,,Dover. You and Douglas Franklin Whitnall courted for a few years, after he had returned from South East Asia, where he served in the Signals Regiment, mainly n Burma, after being conscripted into the war at 18 years old.

Marrying in April 1953, you set up home at 8 Kings Road in Dover, where Alison and I were brought up.

Many of those years, I remember, were closely shared with our neighbours, Ivy and Mo, who lived at number 6. As I write this, in July 2024, they are still living there. We used to have a gate between our two gardens so we could share coffee or a chat or meals together, and there was also a pebble that we used to use to knock the adjoining wall between our two houses as a signal that either coffee was made or that ww wanted to ask something. I guess it saved on phone calls!!

Mo caused hilarity at every opportunity and I still have fond memories of him pretending to be a vicar, with a pair of Ivy's knickers as a 'handkerchief' in his top pocket, which he drew out at an opportune moment in his character sketch to the amusement of everyone in the room. What was even funnier was when Ivy and Mo's daughter, Carolyn, reported in her daily diary at school soon afterwards about how the milkman knocked on the front door to 'give Mummy her knickers back'!! Mo had left our house late that night, rather well oiled and inadvertently dropped his 'handkerchief' in the front garden, where the milkman, who came next morning, found the infamous pair of knickers.

Great times for sure. So often, it was everyone round to Doug and Jean's for a get-together. Usually, Dad would play the piano and you would sing, Mum. I remember, too, when Dad would play the piano while you would sing while washing up in the kitchen. Very happy memories.

As Alison and I grew up, there was a fairly structured routine to our lives, especially around meals. Roast on Sunday. Using up leftovers on Monday. Fish and chips on Fridays. That sort of thing. During the week, Dad would arrive home from work at F W Maull and Sons and would expect dinner to be on the table at half past six. And heaven help us if we slouched over our dinner or if we spoke while The Archers was on - broadcast through the transistor radio.

After Alison and I grew up, thoughts of moving went through your minds and, in 1981, you moved to West Hougham, and Chrissie and I, who had married 4 years before, bought the family home at Kings Road.

13, Lady Garne Road became home for you and Dad and you renovated the house, making the lounge look like a pub with false beams and horse brasses added in an attempt to make it look authentic. The entertainment continued and friends and neighbours would be well fed and....erm....'watered' and the piano playing and electric organ playing only stopped once Dad had a massive stroke when he was only 66 years old.

You and Dad, by this time, had spent several holidays abroad - mainly in Yugoslavia, the part now called Croatia and Malta, where Joyce and Brother in Law Allan - known aa Midge - would often accompany you.

After Dad passed in 1999, and you had spent seven years as his main carer, you continued holidays, both abroad and in the UK.

You finally gave up driving when you were 89, much to mine and Alison's relief! Sadly, much of your independence disappeared with your loss of transport, but in the spirit of making the best of it, you threw yourself more into village life and would spend much time with your wonderful friends who lived in rhe same street. There were your amazing neighbours, Jules and John - now enjoying life in Scotland. They were succeeded by Ruth and Mark and family, who were such a lifeline to us all. Then there was Tracey and Steve - your other next-door neighbours, who were also such an incredible support to you, Mum, and to us.

You had, for many years, marvellous friendships in the community with Daphne, Maureen, and Carole ( all sadly gone, too) as well as your cousin Beryl, who, with husband Jack, was one of the reasons you and Dad moved to West Hougham in the first place.

Things have changed since you moved there 43cyears ago. There used to be a pub, a post office, a village shop, a bakery and a bus service - all now gone.

You enjoyed so many clubs and activities, Mum.
Wendy's Sewing Circle, Gardening Clubs, Table Tennis Club, Village Hall Committee and so many more. You experienced so many places and probably visited almost every county in the UK, if your thousands of photos are anything to go by!

Such a full life, and then you suffered so much last year
( 2023) when life bowled several curve balls. After collapsing at home last March, having a pacemaker fitted and then a massive stroke, you fought back like the fighter you were. It waa the sepsis you contracted in September of 2023 that dealt such a tough blow that you needed full time care.

Even though you were initially reluctant about going into a residential home, the care you received at Alexander waa exceptional. The care staff and management team were more like our extended family and certainly over the last few months, as a family, we could not have made it through without them. Our biggest thanks to them all and to everyone who has been so incredibly supportive to us as a family and to you, Mum, personally.

Neighbours, friends old and new, family - all have rallied to be there for you. In so many ways, it reflects what you gave to this world, which has lost so much in your passing.

Now, there is no more pain, after several difficult days towards the end. Now, with Dad once more with you - and he's waited a very long time for you ( 25 years and 3 days) - you can once again enjoy the times you once had together.

Mum and Dad, please watch over us all. Especially, guide our newest family members to become their very best selves.

Let's call this au revoir and not goodbye. Goodbye is too final. We love you. XXXXX