Stephen Gardiner (12 Dec 1958 - 10 Jun 2023)

In loving memory of Stephen Gardiner who sadly passed away on 10th June 2023, aged 64 years.

Stephen was born in Derby on 12th December 1958, the youngest of four children. He had a sister and two brothers. A much loved baby with blue eyes and a cloud of blonde hair. Within a few years he had metamorphosed into a much loved but irritating little brother who had to be minded by his big sister.

His education commenced briefly at St Philomena’s Convent School, but when the family moved to Nottingham in 1964 he moved to St Theresa’s Primary School in Aspley. There he met another blonde, blue eyed boy, called Stephen Willis. They became best friends and remained so for the rest of his life. He passed his eleven plus and went to The Becket RC Grammar School for boys. He passed a dozen O’levels without much effort, he enjoyed cross country running, and excelled at rowing. He was the stroke in the Four that represented England in Cork in 1976 in the National Rowing Chamionships.

However it was his lifelong friendships with Chris Prokopyszyn, Patrick Allinson, Nick Max, Aidan Goulding and Brendan McKeating that brought him immense pleasure throughout his life.

In 1975 the school became comprehensive and girls were admitted. More lifelong friendships blossomed with Kay Martin, Jayne Bates, Clare Connolly and of course Kathleen Carty. The pair started dating in the Upper Sixth and stopped studying, so they both had to resit their A’Levels. Steve went onto to read law at Newcastle on Tyne Polytechnic. After university he decided against a legal career and after working briefly in a building society he decided to go into management at Carter's Soft Drinks Company. In August 1987 he married Kathleen and although they both had full time jobs they soon started buying dilapidated houses and worked together at weekends renovating them.

In 1992 they took a year out to travel the world, visiting East Africa, India( where they trecked in the Himalayas), Asia, Australia, New Zealand, Fiji and finally spending two months exploring much of North America.

On his return Steve became self-employed. He devoted his time to property development and management of residential rentals including his father in laws portfolio. He spent much of his time on the farm at Trowell helping with paperwork and trying to manage Mick and his menagerie of animals. All of his diplomatic skills and ingenuity were put to use regularly when cattle escaped onto motorways or horses took off down highways or postmen were bitten by Alsatians and the authorities had to be persuaded prosecution was not in the public interest!!

Steve became astute at finding property bargains, the jewel in the crown being their marital home in a quarter acre site on Cow Lane. He designed the extension and managed the year-long refurbishment project. They both crafted the house into their dream home where they lived for 20 years. He spent many happy hours there entertaining family and friends into the wee small hours. Although he worked for himself he had the support of a loyal team of highly skilled contractors who over the decades themselves became true friends.

Sadly Stephen and Kathleen were unable to have children. This was a heavy cross for them both to bear and eventually in 2012 this took its toll and the marriage ended. However, they remained good friends for the rest of his life and Steve maintained his close ties with his father in law Mick, the farm and the Carty family.

He loved Gardiner family gatherings, especially at Christmas with his parents or simply having dinner with John and Anne. The visits to Andy and Julie after a day picnicking at Henley, or new year when Dorothy and Peter came visiting with their children. He enjoyed those hours of family chat around the dining table and those long summer days languishing in the garden after a BBQ playing with his nieces and nephews. The weekend spent in Whitewell with all the family for his parent’s golden wedding anniversary was very special to him. Him and John sledging down the hill with nieces piled on their backs and Molly the Jack Russell racing beside them on a snowy Bramcote Park has gone down in family lore.

Tragically in 2017 Steve was diagnosed with dementia. He bore his illness with incredible fortitude and courage. He made the most of the time he had left and with the support of Alison, Dorothy and Debbie he was able to stay in his own home until 2021. He also got to fulfil his dream of cruising in the Caribbean, and was able to visit Ireland again, spend numerous holidays in Norfolk, Cambridge, Derbyshire and Stamford.

The disease robbed him of his ability to read for long periods. This was a major loss as he had been a voracious reader since childhood. His passion was fantasy and science fiction. His favourites were Tolkien, Asimov, Prattchet and many more. He loved politics and current affairs and enjoyed many lively discussions around the kitchen table. His wit and repartee were legendary as were his moves on the dance floor. His sense of humour was not completely crushed by his dementia and it still sparked into life with a sardonic look through those pale blue eyes.

Stephen’s suffering ceased on the morning of the tenth of June 2023, when he passed away with his sister Dorothy, her family and Kathleen by his side.