Peter Louis Cook (9 Dec 1944 - 24 Jul 2022)

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PeterHeadway - the brain injury association

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Location
Basildon Crematorium Church Road Basildon SS13 2HG
Date
5th Sep 2022
Time
10am
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Location
Boyce Hill Golf Club 125 Vicarage Hill Benfleet SS7 1PD -
Date
5th Sep 2022
Time
11am

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Peter was born on 9th December, 1944 in West Ham in London, the second son of William and Mildred Cook. He grew up during the aftermath and deprivation of the Second World War in Leytonstone at his beloved childhood home, where he formed many of his happiest memories. Peter loved the long garden where he played cricket with his brothers and dad and tried not to damage his mother's trees. When Peter was born he had an older brother Robert (Bob) and then almost ten years later had a younger brother John. His dad called them ‘the big ‘un, the little ‘un and the bugger’. The brothers all enjoyed sports and music, and Peter inherited a love of Bing Crosby from his father. Every Christmas morning would begin with Bing singing White Christmas to Peter's house throughout his life.

Peter went to school at Mayville Primary School and then Norlington Road School. His school years passed producing memories and stories of sporting accomplishments, from his success in the 800m to his sneaking out to take part in a boxing match. Peter excelled at almost every sport he turned his hand to, he was a natural athlete, but his main sporting love was football. Although he played in every position at some time, he settled into two roles centre back and goalkeeper. Peter had trials for Leyton Orient and even played at Arsenal's ground during one match. His footballing heart though was reserved for Tottenham Hotspur and the great double-winning team of 1960/61. Peter could list every player from that team even to the end of his life, it meant that much to him.

Peter would have loved to pursue a career in football, but when finishing school his work experience led him to a position working at the Evening Star newspaper in London. He lost his job at the newspaper when it was restructured in the 1960s. He then joined Sharpe-Fairbrothers accountants as a trainee, but after a few years his position was cut and Peter joined London Underground as a booking clerk. Peter would stay at London Underground for most of his career, progressing from booking clerk up to station supervisor, and working on the Metropolitan, Northern and Central lines, and being rostered at Oxford Circus and Liverpool Street Station. Peter was a natural fit for figures and accountancy, he was adept at arithmetic and his mind would keep working over calculations even when he was asleep - on one memorable occasion he woke from his sleep, sat up in bed and announced the name of the forger who had been fixing the books he was reviewing. He called out ‘F. P. Knutt, it was f***ing peanut’, slumped back into the bed cracking his head, said ‘that’ll sink the ship’ and went straight back to sleep.

It was while Peter was working as an accountant that he met Ann while he was auditing a company that she worked for. He swiftly fell in love and began to try to court her, it took much more than a decade of dedication but eventually they were married in London on 6th September 1976. Peter became a substitute father for Geoffrey, Ann's child from her first marriage, and soon became a father to a son Paul in 1978 and a daughter Lisa in 1980. Peter and Ann had struck a deal that when they started a family together, they would move to a house with a garden. Peter wanted his children to have the same happy experience of playing in the garden he had so loved, and so in 1978 they moved to Leigh-on-Sea.

Peter was the most wonderful father. As his children were growing up he had switched to working night shifts at London Underground, while he was a chief clerk at Oxford Circus. He would see his children briefly in the morning when he was coming home from work to go to sleep, and then when they came home after school when he would be preparing for work. No amount of exhaustion would deter Peter from playing games in the garden with his children, holding dinner table discussions, telling stories, or singing songs in the bath tub. As the children grew, the family wanted a larger house, and moved to Benfleet, where although the house was bigger, the garden was smaller. Football was often restricted to playing in the living room with a hacky sack, where Peter tried not to damage his wife's flowers. Whenever he could, Peter was generous to his children, from the hidden 50p coin passed on while holding hands crossing the road, through the racking up of credit card bills in order to buy Christmas presents (the cause of not a little marital strife), to the once-in-a-lifetime family holiday to Florida to see Disneyland and all the attractions. His hard work and efforts were almost all directed at giving his family the happiest years, as he had experienced.

Peter had a deep and independent love of music, he did not follow the crowd but followed the music that moved him. In the 1960's, when he might have followed the Beatles, the Rolling Stones or Bob Dylan, Peter discovered the Kingston Trio and The Limeliters, two groups whose folk songs and humour would stay with him the rest of his life. Peter's love of folk music stemmed in part from the gentle comedy of the songs, but also in part from the community and social spirit that their lyrics captured. Peter believed above all in people looking after each other and being kind to one another, a spirit that he embodied.

Peter retired early from London Underground for medical reasons at the age of 50, and began training to work with computers in Westcliff. His medical problem was due to a benign cyst growing near his brain, which had ruptured so that when he lent forwards to a sufficient angle the fluid would leak out and the pressure drop caused him to pass out. After a Christmas party at his training centre, he came somewhat merrily to the long steps at Westcliff station, leant forward to take the handrail, passed out and fell to the bottom of the steps. The family came to find him at the A&E at the hospital, where he could be quickly found because he was bellowing out Limeliters songs at the top of his lungs. After that, he decided he should get something done about the cyst.

The head operation took place in February of 1997 and all went apparently well, but when he got home he was suffering immensely from a pain in his head. He had caught meningitis in the hospital and was rapidly taken back to be treated. It was a near thing: he needed five head operations, and suffered brain damage during them. It took him many months to recuperate physically, and the brain damage meant that he was a changed man. His personality became much quieter, his memory was diminished, and he was no longer able to motivate himself to take decisions for himself. It was heart-breaking to see, but he was still himself, it simply was very difficult at first for him to express himself. His wife Ann tried all kinds of treatment to help him retrain his mind, she established regular routines for him, set him off on long walks for exercise (where typically in summer he would walk to a nearby blackberry bush and feast upon the fruit he found) and tried hypnosis in the hope of unlocking the part of Peter that was inaccessible.

Peter would live for 25 years with brain damage, but Ann tragically passed away suddenly in 2007. Against expectations, Peter remained living independently in his house in Benfleet after Ann passed away, although rarely a conversation would pass by without him saying he missed her. The social services and some brilliant care workers (in particular Lyndsey, Theresa, and Vicky), took Peter under their wings and this enabled him to stay in his home. Lyndsey would look after and care for Peter for the rest of his life, always going beyond the call of duty, and becoming as close as family to him. Peter learnt to cook food, to use a credit card and pin, and began regular trips to the Harvester and to the fish and chip shop. His independence gave him the chance to get the skate, chips and a wally he loved, which would often be accompanied by a pint of Guinness. Peter learned to use a mobile phone a little and took many daytrips to London to visit family, throughout this time he also enjoyed family holidays, birthdays, many roast dinners, happy Christmases and searching for his egg at Easter. Some of his solo trips to London, normally to go and seek out his childhood home in Leytonstone, terrified those around him, and often involved police alerts and searches, once with a helicopter, and every time he would make it slowly but surely back to home on his own, wondering what the fuss was about. Over the many years Peter’s brain did regain lots of functionality and some of the best and funniest conversations one could have with him were in the last couple of years, his mind kept on improving.

During these years, Peter attended the Canvey Day Centre, the Basildon Progression Centre and also the Tyrells in Benfleet. He relied on the help of many people to get there but particularly Lyndsey and Rex who volunteered to drive my dad to his daycentres. Peter made many friends and acquaintances, and thanks to the brilliant staff he enjoyed going swimming, bowling, days out to London, cookery, zumba classes and watching Southend United. However, above all, he enjoyed playing solitaire on the computer – his love of card games being passed on from his parents. Peter playing solitaire while demolishing an apple or a bag of Brazil nuts, with the football on was a happy, familiar sight.

Peter hankered for food, the next meal was never far away, and he spent many happy hours at the Harvester, where one year the staff made him customer of the year and gave him a Christmas jumper. If he wasn’t eating fruit, then he was nibbling nuts. On birthdays and special occasions he would love to eat lobster and to drink Chateau Neuf de Pape, but between the meal and desert there would often be time for an apple. When he was younger he would enjoy cooking stews and trying to make crème brûlée, he also brewed beer and had a go at home made wine too. Peter kept a well-stocked cocktail cabinet and would enjoy a tipple of brandy or whisky before bed, and he insisted there was Tia Maria at Christmas.

In 2021, Peter had a fall and broke his leg, and he never had the chance to recover his mobility. He was a fighter and he could be stubborn, and he pushed himself to do things the doctors said he could not do. From August 2021 he was cared for amazingly by Alice and her team at Divine Care, who kept him smiling and laughing through some very difficult times. Peter, in his latter years, will be remembered for many things, but everyone who met him will recall his twinkling eyes and bright smile, with which he would greet people under all circumstances (whether he was waking up, going to sleep, or even when he was in some difficulty). His wish to look after others and make sure that they were okay kept him smiling, joking and giving thumbs up. His frequent jokes will leave an immense void, even his regular joke on being asked if he was alright, of saying ‘I’m half left’, or when asked ‘how do you feel?’ he would use his hand to pat his chest to test how he felt.

Peter caught and succumbed to covid while at hospital for a blood infection and tragically passed away on 24th July 2022.

Peter’s legacy is the many happy and inspiring memories he leaves of good humour, gentleness and kindness. Peter Louis Cook, beloved father, dear brother, friend, and a lovely, joyful person will be missed forever.

Susan, James, Patrick and Patsy N/A donated £50 in memory of Peter
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Kevin Edwards donated £64.71 in memory of Peter

I’m really sorry to hear of Peters passing. I’m really grateful to have been able to read all the wonderful stories you detailed. They all solidified and aligned with the memory and impression that I’ve always held. A very witty jokester with such a special sparkle in his eye! May he rest well now ♥️

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Alice MENSAH Abeka donated in memory of Peter
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Ed & Daphne Wells donated in memory of Peter

Will miss you very much.Rest in Peace.XX

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Clare O’Regan is attending the funeral
O'Regan Family donated £25 in memory of Peter

Rest in peace.

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  • We miss you soo much Peter. It was a pleasure looking after you. You were an inspiration to all the staff at Divine Care Group.

    Posted by Alice on 5/09/2022 Report abuse
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Francesca and Sofia Rivers lit a candle
Francesca Rivers wrote

Wow I absolutely loved reading and learning more about Peters past. I feel grateful knowing such a humble, loving man. I remember Mrs Cook (Ann) well too as one of my favourite dinner ladies. Both will be missed but certainly never forgotten, forever in my ❤️. X

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Angela Simpson wrote

So sorry that I will not be able to attend the funeral but will be thinking of you xx

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Angela Simpson donated in memory of Peter

So sorry to miss the funeral but will be thinking of you xx

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Lyndsey Woodward lit a candle
Frances johnson donated £50 in memory of Peter

To dear Paul..sending my love and deepest sympathy for your lovely dad Peter....love Frances and Michael xx

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Lyndsey Woodward posted a picture
At the harvest  x

At the harvest x

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Lyndsey Woodward donated £50 in memory of Peter

My dear Peter Louis cook, Good luck my friend on your next journey, wherever that may be, I will miss that very cheeky grin and smile when I told you off. Russell, Francesca and Danni are thinking of you Peter and your family. Ps Hercules Sends his love and not to worry, he likes his new home.Xxx

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Lyndsey Woodward donated £15 in memory of Peter

Thinking of you all, Betty Rivers

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Daniela Rivers lit a candle
Daniela Rivers wrote

Peter was a wonderful man, with a warm smile and heart of gold. He will be dearly missed by so many.
I am sorry I cannot attend the funeral, but may he Rest in perfect peace 🌟

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Tina Edwards donated in memory of Peter
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James O’Grady-Walsh is attending the funeral
Caroline Simpson is attending the funeral
Ben Johnson is attending the funeral
Ruth Jones donated £10 in memory of Peter
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Paul Cook is attending the funeral
Paul Cook donated in memory of Peter
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Veronique Fischer donated in memory of Peter
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Geoffrey & Sylvia Simpson is attending the funeral
Geoffrey & Sylvia Simpson lit a candle
Geoffrey & Sylvia Simpson wrote

Peter, a man much loved
A life well-lived
You live on in the memories of all who knew you and in the hearts of all who loved you.
Sleep peacefully.

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Geoffrey Simpson donated in memory of Peter
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Paul Cook posted a picture
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